What purpose does Ivan Gazidis serve???

Last updated : 26 August 2017 By Duane Landsperger

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There are 7 days left in the transfer window and Gooners everywhere are racking their brains trying to figure out one thing, What the Hell are we trying to accomplish?  We have spent the last two months spinning our wheels while our opponents the league over have a transfer window strategy and are working diligently to implement said strategy. 

In the past five days, I have seen us rumored to be pursuing no less than twenty separate deals.  Today we are rumored to be pursuing Virgil Van Djyk, German midfielder Leon Goretzka, Julian Draxler, Jadon Sancho, Marcelo Brozovic (bizarre Mustafi Inter swap deal) Lucas Vazquez, Arda Turan, Jean Michel Seri, Thomas Lemar, Rafinha, Ross Barkley etc.etc. 

At the same time our deadwood fire sale continues to whittle down the squad number with Jon Toral swapping North London for Hull City for a sum of 3 million pounds.  Earlier in the week we sold Gabriel Paulista to Valencia for 10 million, and exiled  Cohen Bramall and Carl Jenkinson to the championship to spend the season under the watchful eye of Birmingham boss Ol’ Arry Redknapp.  According to reliable sources it appears that we will also be shedding Left Back Kieran Gibbs, Striker Lucas Perez, and Right Back  Mathieu Debuchy.  It’s good to see the team beginning to take shape but I can’t help but pondering why was this business not completed in July?  Why was the squad not shaped per the Managers wishes a month ago, and why are we talking about selling Sanchez, Chamberlain, and out of nowhere Mustafi with no time to find suitable replacements?  What has Ivan Gazidis been doing this summer?  What are his responsibilities in reference to our transfer policy?  Why year after year does he seem to be the last executive to execute transfers both in and out in a timely manner.

The 17-18 Gunners are approaching the third match of the season with some gigantic questions yet to be answered.  Ponder our competition,  What major concerns are United facing in reference to unfinished transfer business?  Besides getting Zlatan resigned which seemed to take about 15 minutes.  That’s right absolutely nothing.  City?  The only pressing concern they have is can they pry Sanchez away from us before the window closes.  Are you noticing a trend?  Does it seem like other top clubs carry out their business efficiently, with full disclosure leaving little to the imagination, while we constantly keep our intentions clouded in secrecy.  What is the reason for this and why for the love of God do other teams meet a selling teams’ valuation for a player they choose to purchase and Arsenal have to lowball sellers disrespectfully in literally every transfer we attempt to secure.

Southampton are seeking 60 million for VVD.  I guarantee if we do bid it will be for 52 million instead of just meeting the bloody valuation and agreeing terms.  Schalke will request 32 million for Goretzka which represents fair market value.  I can see the article now, “Arsenal offer 26 million for German Midfielder”.  When Chelsea, United, City, Tottenham and most other clubs of note desire to sign a player they simply pay the valuation if it represents market value to secure the transfer expeditiously.  Arsenal go the used car salesman route seeking to get the factory clear coat thrown in for a bargain price.

This way of doing business needs to stop.  Ivan, if you, the board, the boss , and the parent company want a player simply pay the valuation.  I think you’ll be amazed how much smoother negotiations will go.  You can negotiate on a 2001 Honda Civic not on a 2018 Mercedes CL 63 AMG. 

I have spent the past month coming up with hundreds of plausible, realistic, transfer scenarios that would benefit the club both in the short and long term.   I can no longer waste my time doing this.  I run a lifeguard management company for a living, and Ivan Gazidis makes 2.5 million a year running the football club that I love.  Sadly, there is not a doubt in my mind that I could return this institution of English football to its former glory at a far more efficient rate than the current head of operations.  Alas, I am a blogger and he is the man with the keys to our dreary little kingdom and there is no need for this pleasant little fiction except to say: 

 Ivan,

 

                  Please settle on a target or two who will bolster our ranks today, not with 48 hours left in the window when no one will be willing to sell us anything but their team’s unwanted dead wood.   Be willing to dump Gibbs, Perez, and Debuchy at a cut rate to complete the business in a timely manner, and for God’s sake dump Sanchez and the OX immediately.  Players who wish to strengthen our opposition for the pursuit of fiduciary gain have no right to don the badge.  Replace them with players who desire to pull on the red and white and fight to the gristle for the Arsenal.  I realize that this is a tall order in a single week but you should be well rested having taken the entire summer off.  It’s time to man up like the fans of this great side do every day so that they can pay the exorbitant ticket prices to cheer their team on.

I will leave you with a few ideas:

VVD for 60 million pounds

Sell Sanchez to City for 70 million pounds

Sell Ox to Chelsea for 35 million pounds

Seri for 35 million

Goreztka for 32 million

Deadwood for a combined 25 million

The aforementioned sales would create 130 million, the purchases 127 million.  You would still get to put 3 million back in the kitty and the team would remain capable of a title drive for a 49 million pound layout when you take the 52 million spent on Lacazette and subtract the 3 million you would make while clearing out the old and uninterested to make room for the impassioned new.

49 million isn’t bad to compete for the title.   COYG