Arsenal 0 Chelsea 2: Chavs aided and abetted by piss poor officials

Senderos - Found wanting against Drogba

As it happens both teams started with a 4-5-1 but far more important than any formations or happenings on the pitch was the refereeing and assistant refereeing decisions and indecisons that decided the match.

This game was always going to be 95% about who scored the first goal. Early doors this bitty match looked like it was going the Chavs way as they hit more long balls than Bolton, a feat of extreme endeavour you have to admit. Quite how the Russian crook can be happy to see his money spent to produce a game plan devoid of football is beyond me, but that’s clearly the way it is at the Bridge these days. Rob Styles had the whistle today but there was no way he was either in charge or in control at any point of the match. I’d like to think that the Russian didn’t buy the officials but there have to be questions asked.

Drogba started early by backing in to Senderos and moaning about everything, what a great big tart he is, he’s got whinging down to an art form, his backing in and falling down are quite impressive though. Whereas Cole remains a cheating little lippy gobshite whom has diving down to an art form. It’s just such a shame that Mourinho doesn’t relate the beautiful game with being an art form. What happened today had little or nothing to do with football and the game ended with 22 players on the pitch was because Styles has a testicle free zone, the man obviously has no bollocks.

The game comprised of an even first half and a frustrating second half for Arsenal. The early sparring saw a lino ignore some offsides against the boys in blue so they pushed their luck and then rode their luck rode. Not that Arsenal were too effective to start with, having difficulty in both keeping the ball and breaking them down enough to get in their half. After the first twenty or so minutes we finally got into the game and were unlucky not to go ahead. Hleb, who showed plenty of class today, found Henry who steered a well-aimed low shot against the post but it bounced off the woodwork and away, two inches to the left and it would have been the opener. A spell of attacking football followed with the Chavs back pedalling and Van Persie opened the scoring, at least we thought he had when he fired a low shot home from Freddie’s ball. The flag was up however although those watching at home were quick to text to the ground that the goal should have stood.

Jens - A good display

Two fouls on Van Persie in quick succession both required treatment, but Styles didn’t so much as have a word with either perpetrator. When Robin fouled it was given and he slammed the ball into the ground for a yellow card – dumb but you could relate to his frustration. Philippe and Dogsbreath were at it, but Styles doesn’t like making decisions about too much, so he didn’t. He did however finally book Robben for his 3rd. or 4th. petty little hack at the ankles, this one on Kolo. Bearing in mind that by rights we should have been a goal ahead the game should have been over when Lauren was whacked in the mouth by Essien. The yellow card given was a total bottle job; sendings off don’t come much more clear cut. We’ve all seen what a filthy Russian Count Essien has proven to be in recent games so why are refs reluctant to flash a red card in his direction? Does money really talk that loud?

Kolo was playing at right back but he wasn’t doing so when Robben broke away and got the call on a marginal offside or onside decision. His shot ironically hit the inside of the post before sneaking in. The Chavs then took the piss out of Styles by celebrating for a ridiculous amount of time in front of the North Bank and Dogsbreath travelled back to his own half via Ipswich at about one mile per hour. The two minutes added time at the end of the half was a poor joke because Lauren had surely been on the floor for at least that long after being decked. We didn’t deserve to go behind but shit happens.

Kolo battles on

After the break we never really got our act together until the final stages when the game was long since lost. Senderos took Robben out and could easily have been dismissed but escaped with just a yellow card. Henry also got in on the act and was booked for being late on Carvalho, who not only saw it coming but was already starting his dive before Thierry made contact. Makelele was booked for a foul on Hleb but this came after Essien should have got another yellow for a bad foul on Van Persie but of course escaped with a lecture, this was nothing short of a travesty. Shite refereeing at it’s most offensive. Cole continued his diving and tried his best to get Campbell booked. He then took out Robin and all we got was a throw in. Freddie had a shot blocked and Henry had one well saved but we were not creating enough chances.

Dennis and Rob replaced Freddie and Alexandre but little changed with an additional forward. When Lauren made a mistake at left back by turning the wrong way into Cole the goldfish impersonator ran away and fired one in off the post. 0-2 Chavs. Another twenty-minute goal celebration followed as they continued to take Styles for a ride and Dogsbreath timed his return to their half for New Year celebrations.

After this time wasting was even more rife especially by Cech, but Styles was oblivious – not that it mattered because the match was already lost. We huffed and puffed and failed to shoot often enough to worry the visitors. How sad it was though when an eighteen-year-old had to tell Styles about the laws of the game before he’d condescend to get the book out to fat Frankie, once again for kicking the ball away. Even their subs warming up were kicking the ball away.

We were a poor second best by the end of the match but how different would it all have been if a good goal was allowed and a nasty piece of filth had been sent off?